pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
