Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
