I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
