How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
smell my finger.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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