Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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