i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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