Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
