i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
