i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
