Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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