Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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