i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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