well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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