Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
actually, I'm a sock model
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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