I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
