Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
