who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I would ride that face into the sunset
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
