Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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