i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so let's talk penis.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
