Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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