i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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