these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
You are the jesus of drinking
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
