OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
You can't just leave with hair like that
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
