ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
