I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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