I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize