Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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