Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
