Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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