you would pick up someone in the library
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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