Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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