Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
