Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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