just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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