you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
