I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
