wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Dignity is for republicans.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
