i think my tv is drunk
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
