:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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