During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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