Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
