you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
