he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
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