all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I just want nice things and good sex
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
