hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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