kristin has been a bad kristin
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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