I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
