i just google imaged poop.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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