my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
