I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
